----- * * * * * -----

 A bird flew across the mildly-cloudy, blue sky and chirped its
pleasentries for to hear, symbolizing that all had not gone totally awry in
Nerima.  Below, however, someone was ready and willing to prove that theory
wrong.
 "Hmmm....  Now how should one go about turning down a secret admirer who
just so happens to be a pychotic maniac?"  Genma Saotome, wearing his
generic white gi, was standing outside the gates of the Kunou estate in
deep contemplation, his forehead resting on his right fist while the other
gently held the short stem of a delicate, almost translucent black rose
made from cheesecloth.  Tapping his foot, he mumbled to himself, "I'm
certainly going to have to handle this matter with great care."
 "!"  Suddenly, his head perked up and he slapped his fist in his palm,
holding the rose safely at the end of his first two fingers.  "I've got
it!"  He quickly cleared his throat, bringing his hands together in front
of him, the rose held just under his face.  Closing his eyes humbly and
bowwing his head slightly, he calmly stated to an imaginary Kodachi, "The
rose you left for me is very lovely, Miss Kunou, and I am very flattered,
but it's just too unhealthy for a man my age to be dating a young woman
who's clinically insane.  And then there's my son to think about... why,
he'd practically be your brother... and then you couldn't...."
 Genma's eyes strayed to the sky, his assuredness in word faded entirely,
as he started tapping his foot again.  "Hmm... maybe not."  He once again
rested his forehead on his fist.
 "Ah!"  In a moment of desperate thought, he raised his finger before him.
"I know!"  With excitement, he stated, "We're both martial artists here,
Miss Kunou, but you see, I'm a panda and...."  He paused in mid-gape, then
reverted to his previous thinking position, tapping his foot more
furiously.  _I don't want to risk the chance of turning her on even more.
There's no telling what kind of deviant behaviors she practices._
 "Excuse me."
 With a startled gasp, Genma was suddenly standing on one foot, the other
turned away and ready to run, his free hand raised with index, pinky, and
thumb extended.
 Sasuke blinked in confusion as he stood in the partially-open gateway.
Then, looking at the middle-aged man a bit strangely, he asked, "May I help
you?  You've been standing there for several minutes."
 "Well I... that is... I..."  Was he ready?  At a loss for words, Genma
composed himself by coughing into his hand, ready to try again.
 Twisting his head suspiciously, Sasuke tried to help him out: "Would you
like me to fetch Mistress Kodachi?"
 Genma scratched the back of his head and laughed nervously, "Uh... yeah...
please... if you would."
 After watching the man warily out of the corner of his eye for a few
seconds, the little ninja prompted, "Wait here," and slowly strode back
into the compound.
 Genma hummed and glanced around desperately as he tried to think of
something appropriate to say.  But when he faced forward again, the Black
Rose was staring him in the face.
 "What do you want, peasant?  Who seeks an audience with the Black Rose?"
Kodachi eyed the newcomer coldly for a moment, but then her face brightened
in recognition.  Stepping back and clapping her hands once, she sang, "Oh!
You're Ranma's father, aren't you?  I hardly see you stray outside the
dojo!  Have you come with a message from my love?"
 Still scratching his head, Genma laughed nervously, "Hahahaha... hehe...
no."  Before Kodachi could say anything in response, he held up the
delicate rose and explained, somewhat hurredly, "You see, I've come here to
talk to you about this rose you left by my side during the night... and you
are an attractive young woman... and, in which case, I guess you know my
secret now...."
 With a gasp, Kodachi jumped back, a hand flying over her mouth as she
stammered excitedly, "And what secret would that be?  That you like to prey
upon younger women... and with horrible pick-up lines like that?!  I left
so such flower by your side...."  Suddenly leaning forward, her tone to
that of curiosity: "However, that is a truly marvelous piece of craftwork!
I have seen nothing like it!  I shall have it!"
 Genma, realizing that he had just made a fool of himself, was looking
around frantically for an escape; when he noticed that the gymnast was
reaching for the rose, he quickly retracted his hand.  Hunching his back
and shielding the rose with his arm, he insisted, "It's mine!"
 He held her back with a foot and held the rose at arm's length as she kept
waving her arms trying to reach it, demanding, "Give that to me!  A
delicate piece like that should be in the posession of someone equally as
delicate!"
 Genma found an opening and jumped away from her, childishly insisting,
"You can't have it!"  Then, after executing Genma Saotome Taunting Stance
#3, his arms and knees bent comically as he hopped from foot to foot with a
finger under his eye and tongue sticking out, he laughed maniacally and
bounded off like she often did (minus the spiral of black roses).
 Kodachi watched him go, stunned by his behavior, then turned up her nose
and marched back through the gate.
 "SASUKE!  Why did you even THINK of calling me out to talk to that madman?!"
 "*panic* I-I-I was worried about what he might do if I let him into the
estate!"
 "Hmmm....  In that case, you did well, Sasuke."
 *PHEW*

   ----- * * * * * -----

 Genma sat inside the safe confines of his guest room at the Tendou
household, his eyes closed, index and middle finger angled against his
forehead in confidence.  _So my secret admirer is not Kodachi Kunou.  Thank
the heavens._
 Holding the rose up to his face, he felt a short monologue coming on.
"Perhaps it is best, for now, that I know her (my secret admirer) not and
live with the thought that I am held in someone's heart."
 He flipped open the tattered, tannish manuscript on the floor in front of
him and placed the rose in the crease between its pages.  "And perhaps some
day, I will have the pleasure of meeting you so that I may ask why I am
worthy to be held in such high regard."
 As he gently pressed the rose between the pages, closing the book with a
thoughtfulness he hadn't felt in years, he concluded, "But for now, your
secret will be protected within the bindings of this ancient tome."
Swash-stroked Japanese characters read down the face of the book: "Saotome
School of Anything Goes Final Attack: Cat Fist."

   ----- * * * * * -----

 "Now where could he be?"  Cologne bounded into the street in front of the
Furinkan High gates, wondering why her intuition was telling her Thyme
would be there--was it her specially-honed Amizonian granny senses
tingling, or was it some unseen force who beckoned her there to avoid
further plot devices.
 She hopped through the gates, glancing about, then paused when she heard
the familiar battlecry, "RANMA SAOTOME, PREPARE TO DIE!!!"
 She turned.  "Oh, there he is," the old woman said as if she expected
Thyme to be in the area all along.  Then, smiling and shaking her head
condescendingly, she chuckled, "My, that Kunou fellow can be so childish
sometimes.

 "And then this...!  Hya!"  The Blue Thunder, now sporting several bruises
and slap-marks on his face as well as a strip of white cloth that served
both as a headband and a bandage, pirouetted around and sliced gracefully
with his sword at some imaginary opponent.  "The evil wizard didn't stand a
chance!"
 Thyme, sitting cross-legged in the shade, giggled loudly and rapidly
clapped her hands, thoroughly enjoying the swordsman's antics.
 "And then I gave him a this!"  Kunou swung his sword in a broad, downward
arc to his right.  "And a this!  And this!  And this!"  He tightened his
form, elbows bent, bringing his sword in an upward slice before him, then
slashed horizonally with a steadily descending, two-handed blow, then
followed up with a hard diagonal slash to his left, completing a triangular
pattern.
 Then, allowing his sword arm to fall to his side, he clenched his left
fist and closed his eyes as if in painful thought as he seethed bitterly,
"My formidable blows should have finished him off then and there, but
Saotome possesses inhuman endurance, able to take punishment enough to
level a mountain and still survive!  The wretch was merely pretending when
I was sure I had won, looking down upon his battered and broken body,
reciting a silent prayer to the gods of mercy, for while the wizard had no
honor, he fought valiantly."
 Thyme, cluching her hands to her chest and staring up at the warrior with
sparkling tears in her eyes, could only sigh, "So... bwave...."
 Unfinished with his ego-trip, Kunou glanced upward and shook his fist with
restrained fury.  "But I was a fool for turning my back!  I should have
reminded myself that an animal is most dangerous when it is wounded--for
wounded was all all that he was.  As I turned, saying my final farewell,
unbeknowest to me, that barbarian had risen to his feet and was ready to
attack me from behind...."
 Suddenly, a wicked, gravelly voice crept up from behind: "Pardon my
ineruption, Mr. Kunou..."
 "YAAAGH!!"  Kunou instantly drew one knee to waist-level and raised both
hands in warding, his eyes wide and his hair frazzled in shock.
 Cologne, balancing on her staff a few feet away, just rolled her eyes.
She then turned to Thyme and sighed regrettably, "I know you are just
having fun, Little One, but it is time to go.  There's someone back at the
restaurant who is very worried about you."  Thyme's head perked up and she
nodded cheerfully.
 "!"  Worried about who that 'someone' may be, Kunou gathered his wits, and
before Cologne could move forward, she found the tip of his bokken a
fraction of an inch from her nose.  Boldly, he bellowed, "And just what
business do you have with the pigtailed girl, old... woman?!"
 !WHACK! "Yhaaah!"  Kunou flew in an arc and landed on his face several
yards away as Cologne and Thyme steadily hopped/walked out the gate.
 Looking over her shoulder, Thyme giggled, "I wike him.  He funny."
 Cologne nodded.  "I know, Child.  I know."
 *gurgle* Groaning, Kunou tried to lift his had, but it just crashed down
again.

   ----- * * * * * -----

 "Thank you, Wise Woman."  Thyme, now in male form and wearing a clean
white robe from Mousse's closet, sat lotus-style in the center of Shampoo's
bed with his mate curled in his lap and purring as he stroked her ears
affectionately. (CUTE VOICE: Ooh!  Ooh!  Shampoo next!) (CHEF'S NOTE:
*whining* Me first!)
 While glancing placidly down at Rose, he said to Cologne, unable to temper
his words with the urgency they deserved, "Your hospitality is greatly
appreciated, but we mustn't stay for very long.  If Sage has already taken
your two wards, then he is working much faster than I anticipated.  As soon
as Rose wakes up...."
 Cologne, balancing on her staff before him and looking particularly wise
at the moment, halted his babbling with a raised hand, calmly
rationalizing, "Sage will remain in the area until he has confronted my
son-in-law, whom I am assuming is still his main objective.  And I
seriously doubt he will be so quick to strike considering how well
son-in-law dealt with him last time."
 Thyme's lips pursed into a frown and his own hand came to a stop on Rose's
crown; the tiger woman's pur slowed with a sleepy moan of disappointment.
Cologne lowered her hand and sighed, "Have patience.  It is unlikely that
we will find Sage this early in the day with so many people moving
about--he can hide too easily.  When night begins to fall, the tiger will
feel bolder as his prey starts to rest.  Anyway, you will do me little good
in the search unless you are rested and fully alert."
 His hand gliding across Rose's fur once more, Thyme nodded and sighed, "I
suppose you are right, Wise Woman.  I have been pushing myself the last few
days."  Glancing up, letting weariness creep into his eyes at last, he
whispered, "But will you continue the search without me?"
 The old Amazon turned and hopped toward the door, stating over her
shoulder, a tinge of harshness in her voice, "I had no intention of
pausing.  An Amazon's vengence is tireless, and Sage has a few crimes to
answer for." (NOTE: Her way of saying she's worried about Shampoo.)
 After regarding her for a few seconds, almost pitying Sage for crossing
the old warrior, however indirectly, he nodded and muttered, "Thank you."
Then, gently gathering Rose by the shoulders and pulling her to his chest,
he unwrapped his legs and stretched out across the bed; the tiger woman
moaned a sleepy protest at being moved but compliantly stretched out beside
him, huddling close and burying her face into his shoulder when he wrapped
a protective arm around her.
 Cologne said, "Goodnight you two," and turned off the light.  Then she
chuckled to herself as she closed the door, "Ah, the joys of true love."
Shortly after, a faint voice of irritation could be heard down the hall:
"Now why does that son-in-law of mine have to be so stubborn with my Shampoo."

   ----- * * * * * -----

 In a red, monotonal backflash, Ranma sighed as he stood in front of the
bathroom mirror and gazed expressionlessly at his reflection.  Lightly
closing his eyes, he produced a bucket of water and dumped the content over
his head.  When he opened his eyes, he was staring at the youthful,
fiery-haired girl he felt somehow incomplete without.  Ranma placed a
trembling hand to the glass and traced the redhead's features with her
fingers.
 The backflash dissolved, and Ranma-onna was returned to the dinner table,
silently looking down at the empty cup and bowl in front of her, her hands
resting in her lap.  Next to her, Akane had her eyes closed and nose turned
away as she tried to deny Ranma's existence.  Soun and Genma seemed not to
notice Ranma's lowered spirits, laughing among themselves about this and
that while they waited for food to arrive.  Nabiki, however, looked
uncommonly worried, watching her sister and her fiancee out of the corner
of her eye as she tried to look interested in what her father was babbling
about.
 Kasumi's sweet voice rang, "Dinner's ready," and everyone turned in time
to see her enter the room with a platter full of rice in brown sauce,
vegetables, cooked pork and shrimp arranged in such a pleasing display that
master chefs would be envious.  As she walked toward the table, she smiled
and explained, "I decided to try a variation of that stir fry I made
earlier, and I guess I got alittle carried away."
 Genma leaned across the table with his mouth gaped and watering while Soun
slapped his cheeks and cried, tears welling in his eyes, "Kasumi, you've
really outdone yourself.  That's one of your best pieces of artistry yet."
Akane's eyes widened in surprise, but when she remembered that Ranma was
still sitting beside her, she looked away again.  Nabiki gave a surprised,
"Ooh," and picked up her bowl and chopsticks in constrained eagerness, then
turned to Ranma to see his reaction, but was disappointed to see that her
sullen expression had not changed.
 As Kasumi set the platter in the center of the table, she looked at Ranma
with sudden surprise.  "Oh!  Ranma, will you be eating with us in your girl
form?"
 Ranma droned without looking up, "What's tha difference?  The food still
tastes tha same."
 Akane suddenly turned around and slapped Ranma on the shoulder, snapping,
"She was only asking you a question!  No reason to be rude!"  Soun and
Genma froze and stared at the two.
 Kasumi, feeling a bit awkward, tried to dismiss the scene by smiling and
saying, "That's alright Akane.  It's just that Ranma always seems to prefer
eating at the table in his male form."
 Ranma droned again, "Well, this time, I prefer to be in my female form, if
you don't mind."
 As Kasumi sat down in front of the table, she tried to conclude the uneasy
conversation by saying, "Oh no, that's perfectly fine if that's what you
want.  It's good that you're willing to try new things."
 Nabiki looked at Akane and teased, "Y'hear that, Sis.  Willing to try new
things.  Aren't you lucky to have him as a fiancee?"
 Akane turned her nose up even more, unwilling to respond.
 Kasumi smiled at Nabiki, then told everyone to dig in.
 Everyone ravenously tore at the food on the platter to get it in his/her
bowl--everyone except Ranma, who just sat there with hands folded over her
lap, looking at though she were being left out.
 Soun and Genma ate like there was no tomorrow while Akane and Kasumi ate
at a more presentable level.  Nabiki, however, just held the chopsticks
before her parted lips as she watched Ranma deflate even more.  After a
moments pause of feeling atypically empathic for Ranma, Nabiki reached
across the table and offered him the morsel at the end of her chopsticks,
stating, "Try it, Ranma, it's really good."
 Ranma glared at it with suspicion.  "How much will it cost me?"
 Nabiki, looking a bit hurt, leaned close and put her other hand aside her
mouth, whispering, "It's on the house."  But she wasn't quiet enough.
Everyone else, even Kasumi, paused in his/her eating to stare at Nabiki in
disbelief. 
 Akane slammed her bowl on the table and turned to Ranma, shouting, "I
don't believe this!  At this rate, you'll have everyone waiting on you hand
and foot!"
 Nabiki turned to Akane and asked, still holding her chopsticks in front of
Ranma, "Why, whatever do you mean?"
 "Just look at what your doing, Nabiki!"  Akane stood up and pointed an
accusing finger at Ranma.  "He had Ukyou doing the same thing, in case
you've forgotten.  And he got Hinako-sensei to let him go home early today!
 All because he gets alittle depressed about some dumb girl who isn't even
real!"  She turned away and folded her arms defiantly.  "And don't forget
that HE took a bath with Ukyou last week!"
 Kasumi placed her hands in front of her mouth and gasped, although Soun
and Genma didn't seem as fazed as they should have been.  Kasumi looked at
Ranma with worried eyes and asked, "Is that true, Ranma?"
 Ranma closed her eyes and sighed, "I honestly have no idea what she was
talking about."
 Akane pointed a finger at Ranma and dared him to deny, "And I guess you
don't remember kissing me earlier today either..."  Nabiki fumbled her
chopsticks and looked shocked, but then her eyes flattened out in disbelief
when Akane continued, "...and then running off, giggling like a little
girl!"  A sweatdrop appeared on Nabiki's forehead as she thought _That's
it.  Sis's finally gone off the deep end._
 "Believe what you want," Ranma sighed as she stood up, her eyes still
closed and her head down.  With everyone else (except Akane) staring up at
her in worry, she announced, "I don't feel well.  If you'll excuse me, I'm
going to my room."  After a moderate pause in which no one moved, Soun
figured that Ranma was addressing him, so he nodded once.
 The redheaded, pigtailed girl then turned around and trudged toward the
stairs, everyone watching her every step of the way.  When she was out of
sight, Akane broke her chopsticks and yelled, "What is wrong with that jerk?"